Paging Mr. Armstrong, Paging Mr. Armstrong

Oh man! Have you guys seen this?

Tour de France legend Lance Armstrong is calling on legions of Twitter users to track down a one-of-a-kind bicycle stolen from a northern California racing venue.

Armstrong sent out a rallying cry to the more than 128,000 Twitter members who have signed up to receive the brief text messages he routinely fires off on the popular micro-blogging service.

It appears Lance, who I dislike, had his bike stolen. But he chained it up so tightly.

Listen, Lance, here's some words of advice for you. First, go find the winey rich kid in town and confront him. He'll probably be in his pool sized bathtub when you go to see him. Confuse him with such comments as, "I know you are, but what am I."

Then, you will need to take a cross country trip that will involve many different adventures... including you dancing to "Tequila" on the bar after knocking over a slew of motocycles.

Finally, you'll probably have to cross dress as a nun on a Hollywood set to get it back. But fear not, you will get the bike back... after a big adventure.

They might even make a movie about it. Giving you the role of bellhop.