Best of the Decade: Personal

Looking back, the first half of the '00s were uneventful and eventful, but not life changing. I mean, I graduated college, got a job, got my masters, won a Derringer Award, got a better paying and more steady job, but the ball really didn't get rolling until 2005 (in fact, if you look at the dates, my masters wasn't given out until 2005 and I didn't start the job until 2005... so bam... the first 5 years were boring.)

But the next five... WHOA... Let's go through them rapid fire:

2005: Aforementioned job and master's degree. Started meeting writers at book signings. Went to my first Bouchercon via solo road trip to Chicago. Got agent. Fun times.

2006: MOVED OUT. Take that Judy Bobalik! Got first book deal. Got excited about said book deal.

2007: Book came out. Life was exciting.

2008: Met a fantastic girl. Second book came out.

2009: Turned 30. Got engaged. Worked hard on a book that I hope to finish in the next decade... or 2010.

So, let's boil that down. If I had sat down and made a 5 year plan at the very beginning of 2005 and all of it came true, it'd look like this: Complete my masters, get a good stable job, move out, finish a book, get an agent, get a book deal, sell books, meet a girl, get engaged, put out a second book.

I'd say that's a pretty successful five years. I'd say it's a pretty successful decade. Let's hope I keep pushing forward.

Here's to the '10s! Happy New Year!

Best of the Decade: Entertainment

TEN YEARS?

You expect me to remember the things that happened over the past ten years and then rank them?

Yeesh.

Okay, I'll give it a try.

Books:

I'm not going to do summaries. I'm just going to give you a quick list of books that stuck out and a personal moment:

EVERY SECRET THING by Laura Lippman: I read this book while I was student teaching in Paterson's EastSide High School. I sat in my car on my lunch and didn't want to go back in.

SEVERANCE PACKAGE by Duane Swierczynski: I read this book over a weekend when a lot was going on in my life. And, even though a ton was going on, I couldn't tear myself away.

THE DAWN PATROL by Don Winslow: The last book I can remember losing sleep over. Like a lot of sleep.

SHUTTER ISLAND by Dennis Lehane: Two weeks ago, I wrote on my blog about the logs. They still stick with me.

SPORTS:

Aaron Boone's Home Run: I was screaming my head off in glory and awe. I couldn't believe the playoff series I just saw. I remember disagreeing with a lot of my friends afterward. They said after that series, the World Series didn't matter. Greatest Playoff Series I've ever seen.

Giants Super Bowl: Thought the Giants would just be run over. Tyree's catch is still an amazing play.

Rutgers vs. Louisville '06: Greatest Sporting Event I've ever witnessed live.

Rutgers vs. #1 UConn at the RAC in 2004: RU lost by only a few points. I've never heard the place so loud.

Movies and TV:

THE DARK KNIGHT: I am still blown away by Heath Ledger's performance.

LOST: Can't wait to find out what happens this year... but I still remember blowing through the season 1 DVDs in about a week. Just a compelling show.

THE SOPRANOS: The final episode is still bizarre

CASINO ROYALE: Best movie I've ever seen alone. Just a great re-introduction to the Bond series. Way to update him and make him gritty.

What are some of your faves?

New Jersey: The Promised Land--State Slogan

That's an awesome sign, isn't it?

Think of that, NJ's state capital has the guts to accuse the world of taking from it. Puts it in neon right on a bridge. You can see it on the train to Philly. It's a good slogan. And it's got me thinking about other New Jersey slogans.

"Come See for Yourself." That's right, say it with attitude. You haven't been here? Then we don't care what you think. We don't need you to have your pre-conceived notions about us. We're awesome. Come see for yourself.

"New Jersey and You, Perfect together." It's true. New Jersey is for anyone. Perfect for anyone. I mean, really... look back at my other "Promised Land" posts. There's something for everyone. And clearly, there is nothing for anyone in other states.

Compare that to the state slogan of Montana (#26): "Big Sky Country." That's not even a slogan. It's a description. Sort of. What does it even really mean? Montana is saying the sky is big in their state?

What?

The sky is big everywhere. It's the sky. It's not like I look up in the air and think... "Oh man, here in NJ the sky is really small. I wish I was in Montana." No, if I were in Montana I'd probably look up at the sky and think "Damn, there is nothing to do in this state. I wish I was in New Jersey where the sky is equally as big and something more to do!" And country? Like... it's a STATE... It would make more sense if ...

Oh.

My.

God.

Montana is giving us a hint. They are planning on seceding... AND STARTING THEIR OWN COUNTRY... WITH BIG SKIES!!!

BASTARDS!!!!!

You think you're so smart, Montana? Forget it. I'm on to you. And I'm watching you for signs. And if you so much as hint at seceding....

Keep this in mind, ladies and gentlemen... When you're flipping through the channels and stop on CNN or MSNBC or Fox News and you see that Montana has seceded and every one of their citizens is looking in awe at the sky... Remember... New Jersey is not seceding. Now, we're patriotic... And our sky is just as big.

Dave White's Musical Revue-Er-Review: WICKED

It's a tradition in my future wife's family to go out for dinner and attend a Broadway show the day after Christmas. Good tradition, and also gives me fodder for blog reviews. And since I'm not a man who is not at all versed in the art of the musical (other than I've seen my share)... this should be fun. Call me the Anti-Quertermous.

This year's play? WICKED.

Spoilers lie ahead... Be wary...

The play, if you don't know, is about the Wicked Witch of the West and Good Witch Glenda... and how they got to be the people they were in THE WIZARD OF OZ.

Great concept, and based on a book.

Okay, first off, the performances. Fantastic. Great singing all around, great comedic timing, a lot of fun. The characters in the first half of the play are well drawn and seem to be building toward the inevitable "I'm MELTINNGGGGGG" conclusion.

The music. No breakout hits. Nothing I really remember. I remember them being well sung. Something about Gravity. A bouncy song sung by the Wizard. But good stuff overall. And the singing was great.

The plot. Sigh... okay go with me on this one.

I really liked the first half. I loved the Glenda character and learning how she and The Wicked Witch interacted. The first half promises of a great second half, and a play that builds to something really well done.

But then, once the play realizes they have to get certain characters in certain places it completely falls apart.

First off, the people who become the Tin Man and the Scarecrow don't make sense. The Tin Man was a woodsman who cut down trees. Not a munchkin. By the time Dorothy gets to Oz, he's rusted up and stuck in the woods. (I've even looked up the backstory from the books... He wasn't a munchkin.)... Not someone who rallies the troops against the Wicked Witch.

And the Scarecrow... If he was someone who fell in love with Wicked Witch, why would he be scared of her, terrified of her in the Wizard of Oz. Wouldn't he know she wasn't all bad, but kind of good? I guess he has to act that way for the play to end how it ends (we'll get there). But, then, when captured by the witch and tortured by evil flying monkeys, he'd probably change his mind about her.

The Wicked Witch of the East. She gets some shoes, learns to walk, gets pissed at her b/f and takes his heart and is killed about 90 seconds later. How does the entire munchkin population know about her so they can celebrate? Come on now. She has no time to be built up as this horrific woman in Oz. She's just some sister who did a bad thing out of anger and sadness. FALSE.

As for the ending...

A FAKE DEATH? The WITCH DOESN'T DIE? She just sinks into a trap door and waits for the Scarecrow to save her? I mean seriously, this is a story about the tragic downfall of a woman to witch and they go for a tacked on happy ending? The witch melts. Some people who knew her turn out to be sad. Stick with that.

GUH!

Here's what I'm starting to learn about musicals. Story doesn't matter as long as you're distracted by moving, gigantic pieces of scenery and loud singing.

If I wanted that instead of a good story, I'd go to a concert.

Grade: B

Next week: PHANTOM OF THE OPERA

Christmas Eve and Christmas

Well it's the crazy time of year, when everyone does family things, gives gifts, eats too much, drinks too much and does their best to have a jolly ol' time.

I hope you all do too.

I hope Santa brings you all the things you want.

I hope you see family and friends and relieve all the great old memories.

I hope you make new memories.

I hope you eat lots and lots of cookies, and still leave some out overnight for the big man.

Happy Holidays!

Merry Christmas!

Airplane Revisions

As has been stated on this blog multiple times, I am afraid of flying. Like total freak out, panic attack, hyperventilating afraid...

And as I'm about to start another round of revisions, the feeling is the same. Well, not exactly... I haven't hyperventilated yet.. but I have obsessed over it. The amount of stuff I have to change... the bits and pieces of characters that have to change throughout the novel, the amount of words I'm going to have to cut, how long it's going to take. It all goes through my mind over and over again. And the worst part is, I realize it's all my fault, I messed up, and I should have seen this all months ago and fixed it then.

It's all I think about.

Here's the funny thing... This summer, when I flew to Cancun, once I got on the plane, I really relaxed. They kept bringing me drinks... the flight was smooth, I had books to read and my fiancee was sitting next to me in case things got bad. And it wasn't anywhere near as bad as I expected. That's not to say next time the same feelings won't occur, but it's something to keep in mind.

And I know the same thing will happen with revisions. It's always worse when you're thinking about it. Once I slip into the text and start changing things, it just becomes work. It's less frustrating... I'm doing it, I'm making the changes and in a few weeks I'll be done. And if things are bad, my agent is there with me to answer any questions and help out (And now he'll probably kill me for comparing him to my fiancee. And if he doesn't, my fiancee will probably kill me for comparing her to my agent...)

So, into the abyss I go again. I won't freak out, and when I'm done I'll be somewhere I haven't been before. Something new will be within my grasp....

New Jersey: The Promised Land--Deep Fried Hot Dogs

In New Jersey, we have developed the key to happiness. It's not world peace or Christmas spirit or anything like that.

No, it's eating a deep fried hot dog.

There's a place called Rutt's Hut in Clifton. It's a glorious place. Originally a little roadside stand, it's developed into a diner like shack. Wood paneled on the inside with a bar and a section of tables that's always closed, it's homely. The waitresses don't want to be the there, the regulars at the bar don't want to be there, but the people who come for the hot dogs... they want to be there.

And if waiting 30 seconds for a hot dog on the inside is tough for you to do, then you need to go around back and hit the walk-up stand. There, you can ingest 3-4 deep fried dogs and a bag of onion rings so greasy the bag gets soaked through. It's amazing.

And what can we compare that to in Missouri (#25)? A quick Yahoo seach shows me something called Ozark Pudding.

My guess is that's roadkill mixed with milk and put in a blender. It is not a deep fried hot dog. It is the meal of the lonely and depressed. Not the joyous taste of meat, relish and mustard....

Seriously, did someone just find a dead deer and mash it up and mix it with sugar? It makes that splatter sound when you eat it. It doesn't snap, like a hot dog.

Damn, I want a hot dog right now...

And for my NJ readers... Yeah, I know we also have the Texas Weiner and Hot Grill... but that's another entry for another time...

Rutgers Football Wrap-up

In my RU Season Preview, I predicted Rutgers to go 9-3 (before the bowl) losing to Cincy, Maryland, and West Virginia. The team (with the bowl) went 9-4 and lost to Cincy, Pitt, Syracuse, and West Virginia.

Listen, Rutgers was a young team on offense... especially once Tom Savage was given the QB position in the second half of the opening tilt. Mohammad Sanu was a revelation this season, but the running game was never dominant. Assuming RU can replenish its offensive line, the team will be really good in the coming years.

So, what will I remember this year?

Tim Brown's phenomenal catch and run at the end of the UConn game, and finding out he was a high school friend of slain UConn player Jasper Howard.

The stadium full and rocking minutes before the opener.

The defense completely shutting down South Florida on national TV and looking like they were about to roll.

Savage to Sanu over and over.

Devin McCourty's yearlong dominant play.

And ...

Munoz's flip.

What will you remember?

Forgotten Books Friday: SHUTTER ISLAND

Okay, I'm cheating... SHUTTER ISLAND isn't really a forgotten book. I mean it's written by Dennis Lehane and Ali Karim goes off about it in the comments section of every blog that mentions shutters.

But there is a moment in the book that has always stuck out to me... and it's never ever discussed.

It's just passed the big twist at the end of the book. It's when Teddy finally remembers what really happened.

And it's stuck with me for almost a decade.

The description of the logs.

I figured out the big twist in the book about 50 pages in. And I kept waiting and watching to see how Lehane would play it out. And he didn't try to fool you. No... he just went with the super emotional follow up.

I still get chills thinking about the logs.

It's the one book that's stuck with me for this long.

And one of my favorite of the decade.

Dave White as a Teen: The Marching Band

Yep, I was a band geek.

I was in a band known as the "Showband of the Northeast." I played the trumpet. Okay... I "played" the trumpet. Meaning, I held the trumpet up to my mouth and very rarely was a note uttered from the end of the horn.

But I was in it. I paid my dues. I marched. I stood at attention. I stood at ease. I 3 spinned and I right turned and I drilled.

It's funny, thinking back about those days, how little I actually cared about the band part. I mean, I liked it, I must have to do it for four years. But really I was in it for social reasons.

Playing the trumpet past high school was never my thing. It was never EVER an option. I didn't like it that much. A lot of my friends are in music somehow. Band directors, jazz musicians.... homeless.

No, not me.

I used the band to meet friends and to keep friends. It was a social circle. It was a two-hour rehearsal that lead to a lifetime of inside jokes, smiles, and laughs.

So, yes, I would say that spending 8 minutes on a football field and never getting hit by a linebacker lead to something.

I learned how to interact with people. I learned how being "on time" is basically "being late." I learned how to be comfortable in front of an audience. (You have to have a sense of humor when you can barely get through a B flat scale on your own.)

What about you? What did you do to fit in?

The Appeal of Trade Paperback

When I got my first book deal, I didn't know trade paperback was an option. When we made the deal, I thought the only choices were Mass Market and Hardcover.

My agent informed me otherwise soon after.

I love books in trade paperback. The prices are such that you're willing to take a chance on a new author. $14.95 isn't too bad. You could check out a new author and not feel guilty.

Since my book deal trade paperback has lead me to a bunch of new authors:

Charlie Huston: Both the Hank Thompson and Joe Pitt novels came out in TPB. They were brutal, they were different. They were something new and they were great.

Jonathan Maberry: The man mixes sci-fi, horror, and noir into one novel. And it works. These books are great. I wouldn't have tried him out if he was in hardback, as the sci-fi stuff is not my thing.

Reed Farrel Coleman: He's the first I tried out in TPB. His Walking the Perfect Square and Redemption Street are great PI fiction. They walk the road of sentimentality and noir. I wouldn't have tried him in the other two formats either.

I suppose what I'm trying to say it, TPB is a way to experiment with new types of writing. You can take a PI tale and make it sentimental or you can make a thriller. You can make a story into a noir/horror hybrid.

There is good stuff out there. It's just up to you, the reader, to try it.

New Jersey: The Promised Land--Spelling and Counting

In New Jersey, we're educated.

We know how to spell and we know how to count. In NJ, we are (as Brad Parks said) the most densely populated state in the nation. We had to learn how to count people so we knew what our place on line was. We had to know how many people were in a certain place so we wouldn't break a fire code.

We also know how to spell. While "New Jersey" isn't impossible to spell, some of the cities are. Come on, if someone asked you to spell HoHoKus... would you be able to? What about Hoboken or Morristown or Paramus? There are a ton of hard cities to spell in our state.

Which leads us to Mississippi (#24). Everyone knows how to spell that state. It's one of the first things taught to you in elementary school. I mean really, how dumbed down does the state need to be? It's not hard. You learn it in kindergarten and you're set for life.

Not New Jersey. You're expected to know how to spell our cities... whether you know how to or not.

And counting? Please.... 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi. You don't do that with HoHokus... You don't learn to count that way... you don't get assistance. Here in NJ you count... for real.

Don't mess with us... Southern State... We're better than you.

Rutgers Football 2009: What a Change

When I went to RU for undergraduate work Rutgers football was 0-11, 5-6, 2-9, 3-8. Something like that.

Basically, they weren't good.

In fact, my second day on campus, I left the opening game at halftime. The team was down something like 28-0 against a Michael Vick lead Virginia Tech. As I left the stadium, someone told me they'd be all right, freshman Mike MacMahon would be starting soon. Well, we had Mike... and little else. Detroit Lions fans know all about Mike.

Beyond a huge OT upset of Syracuse, my time on the Banks was devoid of interesting football.

In my senior year, they fired coach Terry Shea. And brought in a man named Greg Schiano.

Schiano talked national championships. Schiano talked Big East titles. Schiano had big goals.

Meanwhile, there was a group called Rutgers 1000. They wanted RU to scale back the big time sports. They wanted to focus on being an academic school.

And for four years it sounded like they might be right. RU, under Schiano, lost. And they lost a lot. But something happened after Schiano's fifth year. They made a bowl.

Not a big deal for most schools. But a HUGE deal for Rutgers. Their first since the 70s. Their second bowl EVER.

The next year was 2006. They went 10-2. They beat number 3 Louisville on national TV.

Schiano obliterated Rutgers 1000. I don't think they officially exist anymore.

Since, RU has seemed to take a step back. NFL pros are gone. They are young.

And now people are complaining RU hasn't won the Big East yet.

It's going to come. Give it two years. Schiano turned down Michigan and Miami. Brian Kelly and Rich Rodriguez couldn't turn down bigger deals.

What a change.

Forgotten Books Friday: The Clone Saga

I got back into comic books last year after a long absence from them.

I gave up comic books after Spider-man's clone came back when I was high school.

"What are you talking about, Dave?"

Or, if you're a comic book fan, "This isn't a forgotten book. Hell, love it or hate it, this saga is still coming up in conversation like 15 years later."

You see, in the late 70s, someone thought it would be a good idea for a story if someone made a clone of Spider-man. They fought, the clone fell into a smokestack, and Spider-man question (for all of 3 pages) if he was a clone or the real one. He got tested, but decided that he knew he was the real one without reading the pages given to him.

In the late 90s, when all these characters were getting their status quos all shaken up (Superman "dies," Batman gets his back broken), Marvel decided they should shake up Spider-man's.

And it turns out, the clone lived. Moved to like... Portland or something... and went into hiding.

And eventually, because it sounded cool, he came back to make Spider-man's life a living hell.

I really only made it halfway through the Clone Saga. I thought it was the end, but I found out years later, it wasn't anywhere near the end.

You see, at the point when I checked out, a doctor revealed that the Spider-man I'd been reading about all my life was the clone. And the guy who came back was the real deal.

So the Spidey I'd been reading about packed up his stuff and his wife and moved off to ... who knows where. And the new/old guy took over as Spider-man.

At that point, I stopped. I was an annoyed kid. I figured the stories I'd read and loved had all been about a fake Spider-man. I didn't want to meet a new character. I wanted to see MY Spider-man. The one I knew.

Little did I know how cool an idea this really was. Sure it was driven by sales, and apparently got bloated and overblown, but as a writer sometimes you need to refresh things. Find ways to start a new. Send a character in a new direction.

I don't know what happened after the clone/fake clone took over (apparently at some point over the saga, the real Spider-man came back with his wife from whereever and the clone disintegrated in a battle with the Green Goblin... Yeah, I'm confused too...)

But the writers tried to refresh things. They tried to take something old--the clone story--and come up with something new. They tried to find a way to tell all-new, and all-different Spider-man stories.

They took a huge risk. And any time a writer does that, I respect it.

Well, now I respect it. Back then I was a ticked off geek.

But, kudos Spider-man writing staff. It takes a lot to try and change things around 100%. You guys gave it a shot.

If you publish a graphic novel or two about it, I might actually go and check it out.

(More on the Clone Saga. Because I know I didn't explain it anywhere near good enough. And for even move backstory, check this out. A very cool blog.)

Dave White as a Teen: Dating

I was the worst dater in high school. I had no idea what I was doing. And if you look at an earlier post, you'll noticed that lasted long into my 20s.

I had my first "date" as a freshman in high school. I remember asking the girl to a dance we were both attending. Remember the words just babbling out of my mouth, my arms and ears getting hot, and the lead ball in my stomach. And I remember a key to my high school dating:

The wait list.

It was like college acceptances. Girls in high school could never say yes or no. I don't know if they didn't like being put on the spot or they were waiting for a better option, but you never got an answer at the moment.

"And let's be honest, there was no better option, ladies. If you turned me down you missed out," The 30 year-old Dave says. The non confident 14-17 year old would just shuffle off with a mumbling "Okay."

Even my senior year girlfriend made me wait on the dance invite. And we are talking a fifteen minute wait. We're talking a two week wait. What was so hard about?

Say yes or no. And then I can move on. That way I wouldn't have walked around with said lead ball dragging me down.

It sucked.

Me? On the other hand? From what I can remember, I got asked to things 3 times. Once I said yes and twice I said no. I never made the girl wait.

That didn't mean I didn't make it awkward.

Again, no experience, I didn't know how to let people down nicely. I once told a girl I had plans that night of the Junior Prom (I was a sophomore when asked) and couldn't go. That night she attended the same movie I did... and seeing that movie was spontaneous.

One girl asked if I wanted to go with her to a dance or if she should just leave. I said "Yes.... to the leaving."

Yeah, I was bad.

I'm so glad I've grown up. I'm getting goosebumps and the lead ball just writing this post. Those memories hurt.

Dating as a high school student was hard.

And it didn't get easier.

I just got more practice.

And, like a stand-up comic, a routine.

What are some of your high school dating stories?

What Movie Got Your Into Writing?

One of the questions I often ask writers is: What book got you into writing?

There are a lot of answers, naturally. Writers range from Lehane to Chandler to Mosely to Hemingway to Shakespeare.

And all are understandable.

But I've been thinking about it, and while there are several books that got me into writing (and I'm sure I've mentioned them here), I can only think of one movie.

I saw In the Line of Fire in the theaters with my parents. It was probably in the summer between 8th and 9th grade. I also remember seeing the preview for it when I saw GROUNDHOG DAY.

The preview was John Malkovich, in a voice over, talking about killing the President. While that was happening, all you saw on screen was 1963. The sound of a ticking clock. The "6" spun around to become a "9." At the end of the voice over, Clint Eastwood slams down the phone and says "That's not gonna happen."

I was all in.

We saw it in the theater, and my heart was in my throat as Clint looked through the SEATING CHART (!!) to find Malkovich. When he got dragged on to the elevator at the end. Hell, the rooftop chase. Learning the correct way to spell "ukulele."

Great movie. Still holds up.

And I remember renting the movie and watching it again with my family. And I remember a scene--a montage--late in the film where the Secret Service is planning for the President's arrival and Malkovich is putting on his fatsuit disguise.

And I absently said, "I wonder how this would read in a book."

My parents started talking about how they'd do it, chapter by chapter with about twenty pages of description. How it would be all about building suspense and pacing. I started to play with it in my mind. How would I word those two scenes? Would I try to intertwine them or split them up? Had I read a book like that?

Afterwards, I started to track down political thrillers. I remember reading a book by Jefferey Archer about Saddam Hussein stealing the Declaration of Independence. Something by Christopher Hyde. Trying to get through PATRIOT GAMES by Clancy.

None of them brought the same feel that the movie did. At least not to my freshman mind.

So... now I'm trying to write a book with that feel.

What about you? What movies have inspired you?

New Jersey: The Promised Land--Population Density

Man, Brad Parks is all over the place lately. He was posting over on Do Some Damage about Paris Hilton. And then he was over at Poe's Deadly Daughters talking about characters talking to him. So, multiple personality Brad begged me to post about NJ on this blog. Since his book, Faces of the Gone, comes out today... .ANNNNDDD because people with multiple personality disorder frighten me, I decided to let this former NJ resident tell us why NJ is still great. As usual, I'll have my own comments after he's done:

By Brad Parks
Guest Promised Land Prognosticator

I like people. They’re funny, fascinating, imminently huggable creatures, full of quirks and twists, and they never stop surprising you – among God’s best work, if you ask me.

I even like Dave White. That’s how much I like people.

And if you like people, there’s simply no better state to be than New Jersey, the most densely populated state in America. We cram 8.6 million homo sapiens into a mere 8,729 square miles – a thrilling, hard-driving 1,134 people per stimulating, mall-loving, Taylor-ham-eating square mile. I mean, you basically can’t turn around without bumping into someone!

Especially in towns like Nutley, Clifton, Bloomfield, the real beating heart of Northern New Jersey. For nine years, I lived in Maplewood, with its 23,000 people all writhing on top of each other in an area less than four square miles. There’s an energy, a special vibrancy to a place with that many people crammed in that close. I would even argue there are healthcare benefits: When my neighbor had a cold, I knew about it, because our houses were so close I could hear him sneezing, even with the windows closed.

During that same time, I worked in Newark, one of the ten most densely populated cities in America – 21,000 people per square mile, if you don’t count the land at the air and seaports (and I don’t). Perhaps only sardines are so blessed when it comes to being packed in tightly with fellow members of their species.

Yes, there’s density everywhere you turn in New Jersey.

Not so in, say, Minnesota (#23).

Minnesota stretches its 5.2 million people over a vast 86,943 square miles – a dull, yawing 65.3 people per frozen, hockey-loving, Jesse-Ventura-electing square mile. It poses the existential quandary: If you scream at the top of your lungs in Minnesota, have you really made a sound? No. There’s no one around to hear it.

Plus, two-thirds of the populations lives in the Twin Cities, meaning the rest of the state is basically empty. Why? Because it’s just not worth inhabiting.

I went canoeing once up near the Boundary Waters area in Northern Minnesota, spent 10 days paddling and portaging across a chain of lakes with my brother. We went three days without seeing another living soul. If Minnesota was all that great, don’t you think folks would have at least built summer homes there?

In three days paddling around Lake Hopatcong, you’d probably get invited to at least eight barbeques and two totally awesome keggers.

Why? Because New Jersey is a place where people want to be. It’s got density, baby.

See? Even Brad knows NJ. And yeah, he's right. It's great to have people around. Any time I have a question, I can pretty much find someone to answer it. I can get advice, a plubmer or a pizza on a Saturday night within an hour, and I can talk to people.

When you talk in Minnesota, you know who talks back? Your echo.

Well said, Brad, eh?

For more Brad, visit his website, follow him on Twitter or became a fan of Brad Parks Books on Facebook.

Rutgers Basketball So Far

We are seven games into another college basketball season, and where is RU thus far?

They are 5-2, and seem to be a little better than last year. They've looked really good at times (the win against UMass, they first half of a loss to Florida) and pretty bad at other (Win vs Drexel, Loss to VT, first half today against Colgate).

I can't tell if that's because we're going to be a bad team in the Big East or because it's a team with six new pieces that are still learning to play together. In fact, I don't think you'll be able to tell anything about this team until the UNC game or the Big East season gets going.

They have four games left until then. Games against Monmouth, Rider, NJIT and St. Peters. All are NJ teams, all are at home for RU. RU can lose any of those games. But let's talk about the players:

Mike Rosario: The kid just seems to be off this year. He averaged 16 pts in as a freshman, but now he's not taking the same amount of shots and therefore isn't hitting as many. I can't tell if he's still figuring out when to pass and when to shoot, but he hasn't been as good.

Greg Echinique: This C is going to be a beast. The past two games he's had 21 pts and 19 pts. He hits his free throws. He's a smart player, and he's only going to get better.

Dane Miller: Smooth, athletic, and only a freshmen. Could be a star if developed the right way.

Jonathan Mitchell: The transfer from Florida seems to be playing like the rest of the team plays. Some days he's on, and some days he's off. How he goes so goes the team. He's a PF, so he should be rebounding more, but he seems to just want to tip the ball to another player. Needs to get better.

James Beatty: A pass first PG, finally. He brings energy and tries to make the smooth plays. He's still learning the team and is only going to get better as the season goes on. If he improves dramatically, good things could happen for RU.

Mike Coburn: Also learning how to be a pass first PG. He looks off a step. At times he looks miles better than he has been in past years, but at times he looks lost out there. Needs to step it up.

Hamady N'Diaye: A senior. Still can't catch the ball, and is a hole on offense, unless the team is out running. Great defensively.

Patrick Jackson: Has showed some offensive promise, but has disappeared a bit lately. Seems to be forcing it. Be nice to have him coming off the bench for some jump shooting.

Austin Johnson, Mohammad Hasani, Brian Okam: Too early to tell still.

Hopefully, I'll be able to have a better gauge in the next month or so.

Go RU!

The Coffeehouse

So I have Sirius/XM radio and love it. There are some great channels I check out like The Spectrum (their modern rock station) and Lithium (which is 90s rock).

The other music station I really love is The Coffeehouse. It's a singer/songwriter acoustic channel. Everything on it is acoustic. Sometime they break out some really cool covers by famous artists or covers of famous songs (Like Luka Bloom doing "Dancing Queen" which is odd and fun. And "You and I" by Wilco accompanied by Feist. Good stuff.)

But the last couple of times I've put it on I've heard some damn strange songs.

The first is a version of "Crazy Love" done by both Ray Charles and Van Morrison. Sounds fantastic right? Well, it should... except for one thing... At the end of the song, both Ray and Van try to free style... and, um, it doesn't quite work out. The song becomes a challenge between Ray and Van for who can say "Gimme gimme gimme" more times in the beat? Van is basically screaming it out by the end of the song. Makes me very uncomfortable.

And speaking of uncomfy...

The other strange song I've heard is an acoustic cover of "Crash" (the Dave Matthews tune) by Stevie Nicks.

Whaaaaaa--?

Yes.

Stevie Nicks trying her hardest to get through a song about a peeping tom (at least that's how I've always interpreted it)... She skips the parts about hiking up your skirt. And pretty much everything except "I see the wave coming, crash into me." It's like she heard the song... didn't really get it and tried to sing it as a karaoke tune.

Didn't quite work out.


What are some bizarre covers you've heard?